What is holding you back from success?
If you were asked to count the number of times you have failed, the amount will most likely not exceed two digits. Whereas if you were to begin adding the number of successes in your life, I am positive it would run well over four digits.
If our successes outweigh our failures, what holds us back from experiencing and enjoying success and true happiness?
As adults we bring some unspoken assumptions from our childhood that can plague us. For instance when I was 7 years old, I was asked to sing at a birthday party. Afterwards, all the guests congratulated me; however, my attention got stuck with the two I saw smirking. What registered in my 7 year-old brain was failure. I had failed as a singer… It is possible these two guests were not even smirking at me, but at the age of seven, this was my perception. As a child, the vulnerability we experience is so high and felt so deep that these images are impressed on our brain for a long time. Forever, for many of us. As we age, our conscious mind may not remember the exact image, however, it does remember the exact emotion. Any sense of perceived threat potentially resembling the experience of failure from the past can create a sense of panic, a memory of being made fun of or laughed at.
Through the process of awareness and acknowledging emotions, we can recall the unspoken fear that is stored as images in our brain from our childhood. This level of awareness has the power of transforming our fear. Instead of merely holding on to the old conceptual model of fear; that is False Expectations Appearing Real, it is time to apply the new practical model that true powerlies in taking the responsibility of our fear:
The mind will continue to make a handful of failures from the past paralyze your focus until you are willing to take the reins of success in your hands.
The next time your amygdala gets hijacked by the slightest sign of threat that resembles a smirk from the past, know that the power to resolve the fear from the fleeting emotion is within you and that success is within your reach.
Wishing you much success!
Neerja Arora Bhatia, CPC
Executive Coach, Facilitator & Author
Specializing in Emotional Intelligence